Details? Why, Jamie Dimon gave you his own set of details of how the $4.4 billion lost on the "London Whale" CIO trade was easily balanced out with gains from other areas of the business.
Take a look (straight from their filing):
$4.4 billion pretax loss ($0.69 per share after-tax reduction in earnings) from CIO trading losses and...
$1.0 billion pretax benefit ($0.16 per share after-tax increase in earnings) from securities gains in CIO's investment securities portfolio in Corporate.
$2.1 billion pretax benefit ($0.33 per share after-tax increase in earnings) from reduced loan loss reserves, mostly mortgage and credit card.
$0.8 billion pretax gain ($0.12 per share after-tax increase in earnings) from debit valuation adjustments ("DVA") in the Investment Bank.
$0.5 billion pretax gain ($0.09 per share after-tax increase in earnings) reflecting expected full recovery on a Bear Stearns-related first-loss note in Corporate.
Add the gains up and they come to $4.4 billion. Ta-da! And that six-day losing streak? Fixed it for ya' all in one day.
Simple, really, when you can just lower your loan lass reserves and call that profit, to the tune of $2.1 billion.
Never mind that JP Morgan is restating its first quarter results due to mis-marking of CDS (a crime) and that much of the mis-marking was in the CIO office where the London Whale was busy exploding the balance sheet. But, but, but, during the conference call, CEO Jamie Dimon said it will have no impact on the bottom line. Magic!
JPMorgan's overall net income was $4.96 billion, or $1.21 a share, compared with $5.43 billion, or $1.27 a share, a year earlier. Results for both periods included special items (Why are you not surprised?). Analysts expected 76 cents per share, so, from a purely blind-eye to the past purview, it's a beat, and stock-pickers love that. Shares of JPM soared nearly six percent, up 2.03, to 36.07 per share.
Naturally, just as in the sub-prime, robo-sgning, Libor and other scandals, nobody will see the inside of a prison cell.
You can't make this stuff up unless you're a banker, in which case, you do it on a daily basis, or, more succinctly, a quarterly basis.
JP Morgan's books are so cooked, asbestos gloves are needed to open them. But, hey, wall Street and the rest of the investment crowd criminals loved it, boosting stocks for the first time in six days, effectively squeezing shorts to the tune of another 200+ point gain on the Dow.
Sound familiar? Friday is payday for the banking cartel; seemingly, they're on the two-week model, as today's fiasco comes exactly two weeks after the "Europe's fixed" sugar high rally.
And, just in case anybody's keeping track, volume today was absolutely anemic. So much for support for this, yet another, phony rally.
Everything is manipulated, from the price of oil to what you pay for green beans and everything else, from CDS to, yes, interest rates, from the 0.5% the banks pay to borrow from the Fed, to the 18% they charge you for your credit card. Nice business, isn't it. It's all fixed and you can't win. Only bankers win.
But it's all good, people. A raging stock market makes everybody happy, especially the members of the banking cartel, who live by other laws than ordinary citizens. They cannot go to jail, for anything, ever, and that's the truth.
Live with it.
Dow 12,777.09, +203.82 (1.62%)
NASDAQ 2,908.47, +42.28 (1.48%)
S&P 500 1,356.78, +22.02 (1.65%)
NYSE Composite 7,758.67, +120.02 (1.57%)
NASDAQ Volume 1,356,260,750
NYSE Volume 3,190,493,000
Combined NYSE & NASDAQ Advance - Decline: 3436-1185
Combined NYSE & NASDAQ New highs - New lows: 341-52
WTI crude oil: 87.10, +1.02
Gold: 1,592.00, +26.70
Silver: 27.37, +0.21
Friday, July 13, 2012
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