The U.S. federal government is a dysfunctional mess.
For the second time in under six months, congress has failed to fund the world's largest bureaucracy. This is the stuff of third world nations, a status which the United States seems intent on pursuing.
Because the government has been partially shut down, economic reports which are normally released the week of each month will be delayed. The Bureau of Labor Statistics (yeah, those dolts) announced on Monday, according to CNN:
“The Job Openings and Labor Turnover Survey release for December 2025, Metropolitan Area Employment and Unemployment release for December 2025, and the Employment Situation release for January 2026 will be rescheduled upon the resumption of government funding,” Emily Liddel, associate commissioner for the BLS’ Office of Publications and Special Studies, said via email.
Now, this is odd, because two of these reports concern data from December of last year, so the information is probably in the hands of the bureau's number-crunchers, the only issue, supposedly, should be the timing of the release. If the government is still shut down as of today (Tuesday), the JOLTS report, which was scheduled for release today is understandably delayed, but, if it's not released ASAP after the government partially reopens, then one might suspect that for some reason, the government doesn't want the data made public right away. It's embarrassing.
Worse, the January Non-farm payrolls should be sent up as soon as the government reopens, whenever that is. It's probably going to suck (that's a technical term), possibly showing the U.S. is actually losing jobs rather than create them, putting the lie to President Trump's claim that America is the "hottest" country in the world, a claim many people freezing under severe winter conditions would likely dispute.
That's OK. America can depend on the private firm, ADP, for a fairly accurate reading of employment. Their monthly employment report will be released on Wednesday, as usual, unless the government plans on shutting them down as well. You never know. It could happen. After all, this latest fiasco is all because Senate Democrats and a handful of RINO Republicans didn't want to fund DHS because of the fracas in Minnesota, where ICE agents have killed two people in the past few weeks and the situation on the ground remains one close to an insurrection, with paid protesters harassing federal agents who are attempting to capture and deport illegal human aliens (yes, these aliens are human and they're in the country illegally). It's hard to understand why people are protesting mandated law enforcement, but, then again, it's Minnesota, it's very cold, and people are easily persuaded to do stupid things, given money, incentive, or other stupid prizes.
Meanwhile, it appears President TACO has done it again, spending millions of U.S. dollars to send an "armada" half way around the world to threaten a country - Iran - which is no threat to the United States, though it may be to its neighbor, Israel. The president wants Iran to cease its nuclear-enrichment program which the president said was "obliterated" back in June and also would like the Iranians to - now this would be funny if it wasn't so tragically insane - limit the range of their missiles so they would not reach Israel.
OK. Sounds fair. Our carrier fleet and the IDF can attack you all you like, but you can't shoot back. That's like having a basketball game between the Lakers and the Celtics at Boston Garden in which there's a backboard and basket at one end of the court and none at the other. Final score: Celtics 189, Lakers 0. See how that works? Apparently, the president either has a very twisted sense of humor or none at all, maybe both, since he's proven to himself that impossibilities only exist in smaller people's minds, not his.
Well, that's what we've got, almost. On Monday, the president announced a trade deal with India, in which America is reducing its tariffs on Indian imports from 50% to 18%, India reduces its tariffs to zero on American imports, the Indians will buy oil from the U.S., and possibly Venezuela (which the president insists he's "running") and stop buying oil from Russia. All good, except that there's nothing in writing and India has not indicated that it would stop buying Russian oil. It's suspected that they will continue for the time being or until Trump sends the U.S.S. Lincoln battle group over the ocean to loiter near Mumbai or New Delhi.
Epstein files. Nobody is supposed to know what's in them and the DOJ is making sure that only people that don't matter are accused of fooling around with underage girls because no elected officials would ever do that kind of thing.
All this makes the Wall Street casino look good by comparison, which is double good since the president needs something to boast about, and stocks were up "bigly" (actually, the term "bigly" is a misnomer. It was derived from Trump's first term, when he actually mumbled "big league," but the press and social media didn't quite pick up on it. Oh, well) on Monday, and you can bet your bottom dollar that stocks will be up on Tuesday, whether the government remains partially shut down or not, because, well, America's the hottest country in the world.
Oh, and those wicked, 8-sigma moves in gold, silver, platinum, and palladium, totally normal. Absolutely. Happens all the time. Not rigged to save banks from huge losses. Nope.
After the Close Monday, Rambus (RMBS) - bad, down nine percent pre-market; Palantir (PLTR) - they have no competition, up a mere 11% pre-open; and Teradyne (TER) - awesome, up 10%, all reported fourth quarter results.
Tuesday, before the opening bell:
- Fubo (FUBO) - missed, stock down 18%
- Merck (MRK) - beat, poor guidance, drugs about to become generic, down 2%
- Pfizer (PFE) - beat, barely, but nobody is taking the jab, since covid is a fictional disease, down 5%
- Pepsico (PEP) - beat top and bottom, up 2%, everybody likes junk food and sugar
- PayPal (PYPL) - missed estimates, guidance so poor they changed CEOs, down 17%
You've been briefed. Thank you for your inattention to these matters, especially the Epstein files.
At the Close, Monday, February 2, 2026:
Dow: 49,407.66, +515.19 (+1.05%)
NASDAQ: 23,592.11, +130.29 (+0.56%)
S&P 500: 6,976.44, +37.41 (+0.54%)
NYSE Composite: 22,885.65, +166.33 (+0.73%)
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